By. Anuradha
I have been hurt not only one or two times but multiple times. I have forgiven more than necessary and I have accepted even lame excuses. When my mind said NO I have said YES and I have wasted more than enough energy on toxic relationships. Each time I offered my heart with pure love, it was treated not in the same way but it was shattered down into pieces. Now I am done with that shit forever.
I won’t any longer give my heart to be broken and to be played with. I will no longer be the same person I was. So, if you think that you need me or want to be with me, here are a few things that you must understand first:
#1. I am cautious for a reason.
I have given my heart to people whom I thought are in love with me but was just trying to use me. I have been deceived by friends whom I believed in. I have forgiven things that I should not have ever accepted. So, now I am cautious. I won’t let myself to be used in the same way. Now I have learned my lessons and I won’t repeat the same mistake.
#2. I tend to hold a lot of emotions in until I feel safe.
My heart was shattered many times and it has shaped me into being the person who I am today. Now I am more in the guard of myself. I, of course, am afraid to open up and until I feel I am safe with you, I won’t open up for any reason.
#3. I am very intuitive.
I have almost always dealt with people who played with my heart. They used me and now I am not naïve any longer. Now my intuition is telling me whom to believe or not. I won’t believe in every person anymore. I know a liar when I see one.
#4. Honesty and kindness mean everything to me.
I don’t like a person who has multiple faces. You might be kind to me but disrespect the ones around us. I don’t like such a toxic person. if you cannot treat them with a good heart now, I know you will surely change with time. So, I have zero tolerance for such people.
#5. I want to trust people.
I want to trust people but I am afraid of getting burnt. You will assure me that everything will be fine but I will take sometime before trusting you. you know my past. So, you will have to work to earn my trust and love.
#6. I have a lot to give to the one who will deserve it.
You will never understand the depth of my love. My heart is filled with love and the only thing I need is a person to share that love with and someone who will cherish it. I need someone who will never hesitate to show his love to me and someone who truly deserves me.
#7. I have been through the worst, but I am still hopeful that one day I will find the best.
I have been through hard times and now I am proud of myself for being the person who I am today. I was strong enough to go through the current and each time I dared to rise like a phoenix. Now, I will not lose my hopes again. The worst is over and the best is yet to come.
#8. I need you to be patient.
Sometimes, I will not let you enter into my heart and I will be stubborn and will not let you help me when I am in need. You would end up thinking that I don’t care and I won’t love you. but it is not the truth. But the truth is that I am just being stubborn and I need you to be patient with me. I need you to understand me and if you understand that I will love you forever from the bottom of my heart.
