“Once we recognize the fact that every individual is a treasury of hidden and unsuspected qualities, our lives become richer, our judgment better, and our world is more right. It is not love that is blind, it is only the unnoticed eye that cannot see the real qualities of people.”
― Charles H. Percy
Hope you remember me. The girl who loved you more than herself. The day I met you, I thought that I was going to love you for my entire life and I was very certain that there will be no one who would make me feel the way you did. I was very late to understand that the emotional games that you have created between us. It was back and forth games for many years.
You were everything to me. You were the one person I wanted to spend the rest of my life.
I remember always being excited to come and meet you. I was very young and I was so in love with you. I had great days with you and I remember all the moments that were special and fun.
I never really understood why you treated me that way. All I wanted to do was give you the love I thought you deserved, but you destroyed me instead.
You had convinced me for many years that you were in love with me and you would do anything to make me a happy person. But you fed me with your lies and our relationship was gradually developed with all your lies.
You tortured me with your words. You started being two-faced with me and lied to me when I already knew the truth. You treated me differently in public.
It was never your fault; it was always me. You made me believe that it was all my fault and I was the one who affected the relationship negatively. Therefore, you neglected me whenever you had the chance and you were silent whenever you were upset with me. I sacrificed everything to make this work where you failed to do any of it. You promised me that you would change and not to repeat the same mistake but you never changed. You would always go back to the same person. Therefore, I was consumed by nothing but disapproval, lack of respect, lies, and manipulation.
I thought that I deserved you. I was under impression that there will be no one else to love me like you did because you played me.
I want you to think of the girl who hated herself and she had to wake up forcefully each and every morning. I want you to think of the girl who suffered silently, I want you to think of all the things you never saw and never experienced.
When I moved away from your toxic love, I couldn’t imagine myself with another man. Therefore, that was the reason where we had to keep going back to each other. However, you repeated the same mistake and things didn’t work out.
I am thankful, you were a part of my life, you emotionally destroyed my confidence level and put me to the point where I had to think that I wasn’t ever good enough for you or anyone else.
Finally, I sensed that even though you deserved me and it was not the same for me. I deserve someone better who can love me unconditionally. Someone who can hold my hand in public and walks beside me and not in front of me.
Now I know that I had lost someone who shouldn’t be there in the first place but you have lost someone who did everything to keep you in that place. Therefore, I am grateful that you hurt me and I realized that walking away was the best choice I ever made.
THANK YOU for bringing me to my lowest.
BIG THANK YOU for putting me through darkness and helping me grow.